10 Essential Things I Have Learned from My Mother 19

I know Mother’s Day isn’t easy for many women. I am very aware of the struggle that this is, as I have experienced that many times, for many years. But, during those years, in the midst of my pain, I sometimes forgot my own loving mother. I sometimes was so consumed that I forgot what beauty I had been given by a woman who has always been there for me. She deserves the most beautiful title that I can imagine to give: Mother and Friend.

Mom and mea

I am the only girl of six children, so having five brothers was a lot of fun, but I always have felt a special connection with my mom. We were the only two “ladies” in a house full of testosterone. I am so proud that this woman I call my mother has also become my dearest friend. I can go to her in times of trouble, when I need a listening ear, and when I need a strong support. She has always been there for me, even at the times when I pushed away.  I am so grateful for her. Words truly aren’t enough to express the feelings in my heart.

So, although I may not do it well, today I want to focus on life lessons I have learned from my mother. My mother is a beautiful soul and has taught me many, many lessons. Although there are many more than 10 things I have learned from her, I limit myself today to these:

1.  Love is not shown in grand measures, but in small doses. Although we can buy large gifts or go on extravagant vacations to show our love, love is more consistently shown through small efforts. My mother has taught me that. Through the years of small notes, little gifts, phone calls, warm meals, and constant care, she has shown me that love is shown through the little efforts in daily life. Mother Teresa stated: 

Mother Theresa quotes

2.  Sometimes it truly is better to keep your mouth shut. My family typically says what they think. I have five brothers who are fairly confident in themselves, and they speak their minds. Mom has always been more quiet and contemplative. Over the years I have realized, sometimes you don’t need to say exactly what you are thinking. There are consequences to that!

3.  No matter how much pain you are in, life goes on, and you still get out of bed in the morning.  My mom has experienced a lot of pain. She has had a knee replaced. She has had open-heart surgery. Her health has not always been the best. I know that she lives with pain daily. But, she gets up. She exercises. She cleans the house. Even when she hurts, she moves on with life. I have learned from her that when you don’t feel good, life still goes on. You can choose to sit it out, or you can choose to make the best of difficult times.

4.  Sometimes, the dishes really don’t need to get done. I am very task oriented. I like to get things done. My time is usually divided into sections, and I feel like the clock is always ticking. One of my favorite posts is about my mom:  Mary, Martha and the Lesson of the Leaves. I know that I need a little more Mary in me. I need to stop and smell the roses. God doesn’t care if my dishes aren’t done, or if my bed isn’t perfectly made. Thank you, mom, for reminding me of what is truly important.

5.  Spending time on one’s knees can heal wounds that cannot be reached on one’s feet. Prayer makes a difference. I know at the times when my mom has felt helpless to help another, she gets down on her knees and pours out her heart to God. I have learned, from her, that there are unbridgeable gaps that can be crossed on your knees.

I figured I would just add this in case anyone needs praying for. Just comment anytime, any day. :)

6.  We are imperfect, but that does not mean we are incapable. My mom will fully admit that she is imperfect. But, she doesn’t allow her imperfections to paralyze her. No matter how many mistakes we make, we can still make a difference.

7.  Never, ever, ever give up.

8. You can love someone who hurts you and doesn’t love you back. There have been times when I have seen my mom hurt by someone close to her. There have been moments where that is overwhelming, and the pain has seemed too great. My response is angry and protective. Not mom. Hurt, but still loving. Maybe someday, mom, I can do that. I hope.

9.  Sometimes it is o.k. to shut yourself in your room. We all need a little time occasionally to heal, regroup, and pull ourselves together. There is no weakness in that.

10. Showing love isn’t always convenient, it isn’t always easy, it isn’t always planned, but it will always make a difference. If I could only choose one word to describe my mom, it would be love. She tries so hard to love all those who cross her path. She has tauht me much about love. She loved me through many difficult times. She loves her Savior and her Heavenly Father. She loves my father, her children, and grandchildren.  Love is a verb. It is an action word. It brings us closer to God and therefore, when we share love, we share Godliness.

To love another person is to see the face of God ~ Victor Hugo from Les Miserables.

Thank you, mom.  I love you!

Mom and me dana crop

Photo credit: Keepsake Kreations

To all women this Mother’s Day: I realize that it is often difficult being a women, whether married or single, with children or without, aunt, sister, friend, wife: we are all women. I honor that today. I honor that womanhood is beautiful and we all bring to this life different facets of that beauty with our own individual talents and gifts. We are women. We are beautiful!! 

 Happy Mother’s Day!

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Wife, mother of twins, speaker, and creator of Balm to My Soul.I love to write, speak, sleep, snuggle and, if I really get lucky, inspire and help others. I am clearly imperfect but determined to be a little better every day. Some days are better than others! Thanks for stopping by!
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About Elizabeth

Wife, mother of twins, speaker, and creator of Balm to My Soul. I love to write, speak, sleep, snuggle and, if I really get lucky, inspire and help others. I am clearly imperfect but determined to be a little better every day. Some days are better than others! Thanks for stopping by!

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19 thoughts on “10 Essential Things I Have Learned from My Mother

  • Reply

    Tears, flow, my heart is full, I’m overwhelmed. I don’t know what to say. . . . ..I’ve learned when you don’t know what to say, you can say two things:
    Thank you!
    I love you!
    And, my own personal comment:
    “Thank you, Heavenly Father for giving me one beautiful daughter, who is one of the choicest blessings in my life”.

    My husband said yesterday, “We may only have one daughter”, but she’s the best”

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      Thanks for visiting and for following me on twitter. I need to figure out twitter a little better. Smiles!!

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      Thank you, Ellen. I agree. Mother’s Day is a wonderful day to remember what we have learned, how we have grown, and who helped bring us to where we are. Thanks for stopping by!!

  • Reply
    Meredith Elizabeth

    What a great post to get me reading my Bible Study Chapter. My eyes are crossing from fatigue. This was certainly a “feel good” post that was desperately needed. I have a mom sized hole that is filled by a huge God. Hallelujah! Hope you had a wonderful Mother’s Day.
    Meredith Elizabeth recently posted…You’re not asking too muchMy Profile

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      Thank you Meredith Elizabeth. You have a beautiful name. I agree. Much of what is wanting can be filled by God!! Blessings!

  • Reply
    Create With Joy

    Thank you, Elizabeth, for connecting with me today on my Living Memories Project post, and for writing such a significant article. The pain of my loss has been deepened by unnecessary family chasms and I needed to read so much of what you shared.

    You and your mother are such beautiful people – I am reminded of my mother through your post.

    I’d love for you to share this at my upcoming Inspire Me Monday party (we go live on Sundays and are open all week.

    Have a wonderful week. I look forward to getting to know you and reading more of your blog! 🙂
    Create With Joy recently posted…10% Happier by Dan HarrisMy Profile

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      Thank you! You really touched my heart with your comment. I am so grateful to connect with others here and so grateful that you visited and shared with me. I will share with you at your party! Thank you for the sweet invite and for making my day!!