As School Starts, Let’s Talk About Bullying 22


I did this series of posts earlier this year on bullying, but as school is starting, I thought this deserved a shout out.  

As we prepare our children for school, we focus a lot of energy on buying new clothes, getting school supplies, making sure they have backpacks, and getting their schedules coordinated.  But, do we also prepare our children emotionally?  

serdze85 / Pixabay

I was at a children’s museum this last weekend with my little ones and took a moment to sit down (sigh…).  My oldest sat down at a nearby station to color some dinosaurs.  Another little boy (parent unseen) came up, pushed her out of the way and yelled at her, for apparently no reason.  I watched my little A step aside and her tears were automatically there.  She was shocked and surprised.

Mama Bear came out, and luckily my little one ran to me first, so I had a minute to think more clearly.

Little Boy’s parents were still nowhere in sight. He wandered off.

I gave sweet A a hug, asked her what happened and reassured her she was o.k.  

She went back, sat down and started coloring.  Proud Mama came out as I watched sweet A take several deep breaths to calm down and stop the tears. Then she diligently colored that dinosaur.

Cyber Bullying, Bully, Rumor, Teasing, Lie, Mean, No

 

You see, my little ones have probably been overprotected, but I realize that they are going to face some seemingly senseless unkind acts.  I can’t be there all the time.  I cannot prevent someone from hurting them.  But, I can prepare them.

Emotional intelligence

 

We put a lot of focus on being smart: getting good grades, being the top of the class, getting into the “best” school, scholarships, etc. But, what would be your child’s grade in Emotional Intelligence? As a matter of fact, what would yours be? Have we taught that to our children?

Bullying is a very common issue.  Before your children return to school, take a minute and talk to them.  Sometimes your child may be the bully.  Make sure you talk to them about what boundaries are, what bullying is, and model kind behavior for them. 

Take a minute and go through these posts.  Bullying occurs at all ages: preschool, grade school, intermediate and high school.  Bullying even continues for some into adulthood.  Be sure that you don’t overlook preparing your children for difficult social and emotional situations.

 

Here are the posts:

Stop Bullying! Step One: Awareness

Stop Bullying! Step Two: Intervention

Cyberbullying

Let’s start talking about bullying.  Let’s start talking about emotions.  Talk about these things with your kids.  Let me know what they think and what you learned. Is there bullying going on at your school? 

Leave a comment and let me know!

 

If you want a few more ideas for emotional expression, here are a couple posts:

The Calming Jar

Calming jar2

 

Gingerbread Feelings

Gingerbread man

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Elizabeth

Wife, mother of twins, speaker, and creator of Balm to My Soul.I love to write, speak, sleep, snuggle and, if I really get lucky, inspire and help others. I am clearly imperfect but determined to be a little better every day. Some days are better than others! Thanks for stopping by!
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About Elizabeth

Wife, mother of twins, speaker, and creator of Balm to My Soul. I love to write, speak, sleep, snuggle and, if I really get lucky, inspire and help others. I am clearly imperfect but determined to be a little better every day. Some days are better than others! Thanks for stopping by!


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22 thoughts on “As School Starts, Let’s Talk About Bullying

  • Reply
    Ana Lynn

    I do believe all parents should take a moment and talk to their children about bullying because not all kids know how to deal with that immediately. And it’s important for them to know that they can always come to their parents and talk to them, as well as their teachers.

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      I agree Ana. Even though we can’t prevent all of it, we can prepare our kids so they can respond well. Sometimes the tears or “big” responses, only encourage a bully. I know it was like that with me, only I didn’t realize I was being bullied and every time I cried, the bully just thought that was great! I can laugh about it now, but would love to prevent that feeling with others.

  • Reply
    Michele @ Alwayzbakin

    What a great post. I have three kids and have experienced it with all three of them. It is so difficult to deal with. It hurts so much when your child is hurting. Thank you for sharing all the great ideas and advice. ;-D

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      I know, Michele. I had someone post on my facebook page that they thought it is just part of life and toughens kids up. I thought, I think life will toughen kids up enough. We don’t need bullying to do that. Thanks for sharing!

  • Reply
    Jenna @ A Savory Feast

    This is such a good topic to tackle at the start of a new school year. It’s sad how mean kids can be, but I’m glad you shared some advice on how to help your children overcome it. Thanks for linking up with Hump Day Happenings!

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      Thank you, Jenna, for coming over. Off to visit your post on Harry Potter. What an interesting title… 🙂

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      Yes, we do. Even if your child is never bullied, the likelihood is that they will see it happening. Thanks for stopping over! Have a beautiful day!

  • Reply
    Tammy @ creativekkids

    Great post! My sisters and I are all strong woman, and I just had a talk with my oldest who doesn’t want to be in band as she is just starting an instrument that others have done for a year or two. I told her she needed to learn to not care so much about what others think. It wasn’t bullying, but she is reaching the age that she needs to learn to be strong and not cave to peer pressure. That being said, she does not have to join band if she doesn’t want to. I will not force her to do that if it bothers her so much.

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      Isn’t it hard to want to protect, encourage and teach your children all at the same time? I think the hardest thing is letting them choose for themselves. I know a mother who would do her daughter’s homework because she was so afraid of letting her fail. My little ones aren’t that old yet, but I know I will have to work on allowing them to fail, even when it hurts!

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      Thank you, Susen. My little ones have loved those activities, and we will use them as school starts. Thanks for stopping over!

  • Reply
    Betty

    I agree. Since Michigan just past the anti-bullying law last year, the schools have been more proactive in enforcing no bullying. I find it sad to know that Michigan was one of the last states to make it a law just in 2013. Are we behind times or what?

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      Thank you, Betty. I think that it is so important that we all raise awareness of anti-bullying and teach our kids. I am glad Michigan passed the law. Thanks for visiting.

  • Reply
    Karren Haller

    I think it is a very good thing to arm our kids with emotional intelligence, you are right, they learn all other skills, and this one will help them through their lives. If more children learn these skills there would not be a need for ‘laws’ to govern bullying. But hence the times and we cant put our heads in the sand. Point well made. Thanks for linking up this week!!
    Karren

    • Reply
      balmtomysoul Post author

      I agree, Karren. Sadly, I think we sometimes miss teaching about emotional intelligence in the race to be the “smartest”. I have a friend who is always talking about how smart and successful her children are, but they are lacking in emotional and social intelligence. It causes great issues when interacting with others!

  • Reply
    Brittnei

    I always think of how sad this is. I honestly think despite what the programs are that the schools decide to do, a lot of this stuff starts at home. It’s so much going on in a child’s life that could be making him or her angry and hostile towards others. I think the programs do bring up awareness and cause people to think, but it’s up to the parents if they are going to enforce what everyone on the outside is trying to teach their kids at school.